The phrase “employees quit managers, not their jobs” is often repeated as an absolute truth. It suggests that bad management is the root cause of turnover, but this oversimplifies a complex reality. It’s an appealing narrative—easy to remember and emotionally satisfying—but also reductive.
While bad managers certainly exist, the conversation rarely focuses on the challenges employees can bring to the table—especially when incompetence is involved.
Let’s dig into the other side of the story, the one that’s less convenient to talk about.
When employees are part of the problem
Managing isn’t only about leading a team of top performers; it’s about dealing with the full spectrum of employees. Some are excellent, while others struggle to meet expectations or bring a host of other challenges to the table. There’s the employee who misses deadlines repeatedly, another who resists constructive feedback, and yet another who endlessly complains about their workload—even when it’s comparable to what everyone else is handling.
It’s exhausting for managers, especially when they’re doing their best to provide support and guidance. Imagine a manager juggling multiple priorities while constantly reassuring an employee who says, “This is too much for me,” yet refuses to prioritize effectively or explore solutions.
These situations erode trust on both sides, and when that employee eventually quits, they may tell others it was because of their “demanding manager,” when the real issue was their own inability—or unwillingness—to improve. This is rarely acknowledged in the broader narrative.
Employees are given the benefit of the doubt, while managers are left to defend themselves.
The role matters, but so do expectations
Sometimes employees are a poor fit for the job itself. But poor fit isn’t always about passion or mismatched skills. It’s often about attitude. A job description outlines expectations, yet some employees fail to take those seriously.
They see feedback as micromanagement and constructive criticism as a personal attack. Others complain endlessly that the work is too much. A competent employee recognizes when they’re in the wrong role or out of their depth. An incompetent one blames their manager for “not supporting them enough” when they struggle to meet expectations. This adds unnecessary pressure to the manager, who’s likely juggling other challenges beyond one team member.
Managers deal with more than people realize
The constant refrain that “bad managers drive employees away” assumes that managers operate with complete autonomy. That’s rarely the case. Managers are accountable to their own leaders, work under budget constraints, and often inherit team members they didn’t hire. They don’t always have the luxury of reshaping a role to fit someone’s unique needs or performance gaps.
When employees fail to meet expectations, managers face difficult decisions. Do they escalate the issue to HR, knowing it could affect team morale, or continue trying to coach someone who doesn’t respond? Either way, it’s a no-win situation if the employee ultimately leaves and cites “poor management” as their reason.
Reflecting on bad managers
At the same time, I’ve had my fair share of bad managers. Some didn’t know what they were doing but tried to mask it with bravado. They couldn’t communicate a clear vision, leaving the team directionless. Others created an environment of blame, where every failure was pinned on employees instead of taking a hard look at their own leadership shortcomings.
I’ve worked with managers who were rude, dismissive, and inconsiderate—quick to criticize but slow to appreciate effort. Some thrived on micromanagement and killed any sense of autonomy or ownership in their teams. Others made it personal, letting their moods dictate how they treated people. These managers didn’t just make the job harder; they drained the motivation out of teams that would otherwise have thrived.
Let’s be real—bad managers do push employees out the door. If someone feels belittled, unsupported, or undervalued, staying becomes unbearable. These situations are not just unfortunate; they’re entirely avoidable. But it’s also worth asking: if the manager had been given better resources, training, or support from the organization, would they have been just as bad?
Why the narrative persists
“Employees quit managers, not their jobs” has stuck around because it’s easy to digest and emotionally resonant. People like having someone to blame, and bad managers make an obvious scapegoat. What’s ignored is the reality that incompetence—from the employee’s side—can strain even the most patient, skilled manager.
Turnover isn’t always about leadership. It’s about fit, accountability, and performance. Managers aren’t perfect, but neither are employees. Recognizing this balance is critical to understanding workplace dynamics.
The idea that employees quit managers, not jobs, oversimplifies a nuanced issue. Poor management exists, but so does employee incompetence. Not every employee who quits does so because their manager failed them. Sometimes, they leave because they weren’t performing well and didn’t want to face the consequences.
Workplace dynamics are rarely black-and-white. To fix turnover issues, it’s important to consider the full picture—including the challenges managers face and the role employees play in their own dissatisfaction. Without this balance, we risk perpetuating an incomplete and unfair narrative. At the same time, let’s acknowledge that some managers truly are the problem—and that both organizations and managers themselves have a responsibility to do better.