Ubushakashatsi bwakozwe n’impuguke mu mitekerereze akaba n’umwanditsi w’igitabo When Friendship Hurts (2002), Jan Yager, bugaragaza ko hafi 68% by’abantu bavuga ko bamaze kugambanirwa n’inshuti zabo magara bikabasigira ibikomere.
Usubije amaso mu bushakshatsi bwerekanye ko hagati ya 30% na 60% by’abantu bahemukiwe n’inshuti, bafite ibyago byo guhura n’ibibazo mu mitekerereze, birimo ihungabana rikabije, kwiheba n’agahinda gakabije.
Hari imyitwarire iranga abantu mu mubano wabo n’abandi bishobora gutuma imibanire ihungabana kandi bikagira ingaruka zikomeye ku buzima bwa muntu.
– Kwangiza icyizere wagiriwe
Icyizere cyangirika igihe wakoze uburiganya butuma uwakwizeraga atangira kukwishisha. Muri ibyo bihe amarangamutima ajyanye n’urukundo cyangwa umubano byose birangirika.
Uzabibona kenshi iyo umuntu amennye ibanga, abeshyeye abandi, atubahirije amasezerano yagiranye n’abandi n’ibindi byinshi bituma abo babigiranye bamutakariza icyizere.
-Kuba babura baje
Wigeze kuganira n’inshuti yawe magara, ukabona muricaranye ariko umutima uri ahandi? Bica intege cyane cyane igihe ukeneye umuntu ukumva. Binajyana no kuba ushaka ko inshuti yawe ikuba hafi ariko ikakuburira umwanya. Ibyo biba akenshi intangiriro y’umubabaro.
Ubushakashatsi bwatangajwe mu kinyamakuru Journal of Social and Personal Relationships bwerekanye ko kutigomwa ibintu bimwe ubigiriye inshuti yawe bigira uruhare mu gusenyuka k’umubano wa babiri.
-Ishyari
Ibaze igihe uganira n’inshuti yawe magara muganira ku byo wagezeho, n’imishinga uteganya gukora, aho kubyishimira ukabona agahinda karayishe. Nta kabuza wumva igutengushye.
Umwanditsi w’igitabo Best Friends Forever, Dr. Irene S. Levine, yavuze ko ishyari ari nk’uburozi mu mubano w’abantu.
-Guhisha amarangamutima
Ntawatwika inzu ngo ahishe umwotsi! Igihe uhanganye n’ibibazo bitakoroheye, biragoye kwishima. Niwicecekera, cyangwa ukavuga ibibazo ubica hejuru, nta muntu uzagufasha kubikemura nyamara ibyishimo mu mubano biryoha ku mpande zombi iyo bisangiwe.
Uko kubabara bucece ntibikwangiza wenyine, ahubwo bibabaza n’inshuti yawe ya hafi cyangwa abakuzengurutse bagukunda igihe batamenya uburyo bwiza bagufashamo.
Inzobere mu bijyanye n’imibanire zisaba abantu gutekereza kuri buri kintu bagiye gukora n’aho cyaba gito kuko bigira ingaruka ku bantu benshi.
